Yes, I remember telling you that I really disliked the word bully, bullying, etc.
Except for when you get 4 boys in your office talking about someone that is picking on them during recess. You cannot reframe their thinking until you actually sit down and discuss with them how bullying is disrespectful and being disrespectful is unacceptable. Respect holds them to a higher standard, rather than the terms victim or bystander. So, in order to reframe, you have to use their language.
Lucky for me I was given the opportunity to do a lesson for a 3rd grade class that is having particular difficulties with this situation.
3rd Grade Bullying/ No Tolerance for Disrespect Lesson
1. I created a flip chart for this lesson. I LOVE the Promethean board and if a teacher allows me to use it, I will take full advantage. I have the slides to the flip chart listed below, if you want the actual flip chart shoot me an e-mail and I’ll gladly forward it along.
The main thing that they have to realize (and I learned this from magnificent supervisor, Robin) is bullying is progressive over time (e.g. not a one time recess argument), it is on purpose, and there is an imbalance of power (e.g. the reason most victims are smaller).
This part of the lesson helps them understand that every disagreement is not considered bullying, nor is an argument always disrespectful. Therefore, I give them conflict resolution strategies. When the boys tell their teachers about disagreements or problems, they are not necessarily tattling, they just lack an understanding of how to solve the problem themselves, and therefore need the proper resources.
2. The game allows them to evaluate situations. They are able to see themselves as the bully, victim, and bystander and evaluate what they would to in the various situation. Some of the scenarios are not considered bullying, but instead a conflict and they are asked to decide which conflict resolution strategy to use.
Scenario Cards – Safe at School Game Cards