What does it mean when someone says, “That hurt my feelings?”
A lesson from Jellybean Jamboree for my Kindergarteners.
Topics Covered: Interpersonal Effectiveness, Problem-solving, Communication Skills, and Responsible Behavior
The main purpose of this lesson was for the Kinders to understand what it means when someone says, “That hurts my feelings,” and how to react appropriately afterward.
I start the lesson by explaining that sometimes Emotional Eugene gets his feelings hurt. And when Emotional Eugene’s feelings do get hurt he doesn’t like it.
The example I give pulls in the “Bossy Me.”
Example: On the playground, Emotional Eugene and K.T. Cockatiel were playing a game. All of the sudden, K.T. Cockatiel began bossing Emotional Eugene around, telling Eugene that he wasn’t playing the game correctly. K.T. Cockatiel told Emotional Eugene that if he didn’t play the game his way then they couldn’t be friends anymore (a common problem in Kindergarten if I do say so myself!). Well Emotional Eugene did not like the way his friend was talking to him and this hurt his feelings.
Now here is where the lesson gets tricky . . . did Emotional Eugene actually get hurt? NO But did Emotional Eugene feel good about the way his friend was bossing him around? NO So that’s how we know that his feelings were hurt.
I allow them sometime to brainstorm times that their feelings may have been hurt and we begin to recognize that different things hurt different people’s feelings. Emotional Eugene says that some things will hurt one person’s feelings, but will not hurt another person’s feelings. Why? Because some people may be more sensitive to some things than others (like Miss LeBrasse . . . I obviously do not add that in for the kiddos, but this is where I begin to have the Kindergarten lesson ring bells in my real-life).
We discussed why it’s important to know what things hurt certain people’s feelings.
Once we were all finished, we sat in a circle and shared one thing that hurt our feelings. At the very end of the lesson, we thought about something we could do when we “accidentally” hurt another friend’s feelings.
I assure the boys that Emotional Eugene knows that none of them would hurt someone’s feelings on purpose and knowing that makes him happy!